Let's just be honest here

What is this blog for anyway? Is it to portray an image of me that is perfect? That's what I'm tempted to do.

But let's be honest.

What I don't understand about myself is that I decide one way, but then I act another, doing things I absolutely despise.

I realize that I don't have what it takes. I can will it, but I can't do it.

I decide to do good, but I don't really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway.

My decisions, such as they are, don't result in actions. Something has gone wrong deep within me and gets the better of me every time.

Sound familiar?

Let me put give you a simple example: (its not really what I'm talking about)

I plan to exercise tomorrow. I REALLY want to exercise tomorrow. I know it will benefit me in so many ways. I know that I will feel better after I do. I know it won't really take that long and that it will be worth it.

When tomorrow comes, I DON'T DO IT. I don't have an excuse, I'm not too busy, I just don't do it. And then I'll do something totally counterproductive, like eat ice cream.

What I don't understand about myself is that I decide one way, but then I act another, doing things I absolutely despise.

I don't understand it about myself, but then I read about myself in Romans 7. And it turns out its not something I can do on my own.

Here's the answer: I've tried everything and nothing helps. I'm at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn't that the real question?

The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.

Praise God!